Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Chaos and quilts

I spent time working on my first quilt tonight. Sewing is a great relaxation tool for me. Now, the top is completed and this weekend I will put the layers together and do the actual "quilting". I can hardly wait!

Right now I need the relaxation tool. Stress is huge and I have to do something to break it for myself.

Work is chaotically busy. We just got the numbers for August and it was almost a record breaking month for new orders.

A co-worker has been treating me terribly for a long time. I finally came to the conclusion that I never did anything to her to deserve this treatment and that she has chosen to be miserable... and to try to take everyone she can down her path of misery. I refuse to go with her down her path. Misery is not my way... too much to enjoy in life. So the next time she acts ugly to me, she's in for a shock. I'm not going to ignore it and act like everything is fine. She and the other co-workers will be quite surprised.

My sweet Mother-In-Law has Alzheimer's. She doesn't know who I am now... which breaks my heart for my husband, who will be next. It's horrible to watch an intelligent woman who has been politically savvy all of her life, degenerate into a childlike mind that can only tell us that she wants to go home. And yet, we love her each moment we still have her.

My sister is getting married. Normally that would be cause for a celebration. The man she is marrying is not committed to her... sets off all my alarms that he is an abuser... and I am afraid for her. Her loneliness is screaming and she is not paying attention to anything or anyone else.

Chaos and stress everywhere.

And so I quilt. It's a new hobby and craft, but it relaxes me. I find joy in seeing small pieces of fabric come together to form a beautiful whole.

And so I quilt.

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