same sweet smile

Each time I see her, she has the same sweet, "lights up the room" smile and a killer hug that makes you feel like you are the most important person ever.

Unfortunately she's already moved from cane, to walker to wheelchair. Hard to see such quick progression in just 7 weeks. But, as we were told today, the familial type of ALS moves quicker than the sporadic type. There isn't any prognosis of specific time frames, but it was said clearly that this is moving quickly. She may move from a bi-pap machine to an a-pap soon.

Today a large group met to join forces for practical support and help for the family. Meals, household help and social times are all a part of the needs being met for this precious family. With the number of folks there willing to help, it's going to be a harder task to wait one's turn than to get the help needed. 

Hallelujah! This will allow them to spend their now limited family time as a family, making precious memories.

My emotions are kind of shot, but it is okay. It's the reality of it, right in your face and right now, that really hits hard. In my day to day normal life, I can easily forget the major issues others may be facing. But when I see her, it all comes home again that she is going to die from this.

I gave her an extra hug today... but to be honest, it was selfishly for me.

...may there be mercy and time for more extra hugs - for me and most importantly, for her family.

clutter busting

clutter busting weekend has helped me to sort out my emotions. 

...may there be mercy and peace for us all.

hold us close

She put on her sweet smile and said, "I have Lou Gehrig's disease." As she said it, I saw the deep pain in her husband's eyes.

They were in my office today to sign some papers, these friends of mine. And with those words, spoken with a lovely hope behind them, she shifted my thinking about life... again.

No, I don't have any more answers now. It's only been a couple hours. Quite frankly, I'm still reeling from the shock and throwing a massive temper tantrum at God. Thankfully, he's treating me like an overstressed 2-year-old and just holding me close while I rail, catching my tears until I tire and allow his comfort in.

...may there be mercy and grace to support my friends however they need.

UAQ

Poor little Ugly Ass Quilt. It's become the Charlie Brown Christmas tree in my heart. 

I still think it's totally ugly, but I feel so sorry for it that I am finally finishing it today. Well at least the piecing part of it. I'll take it to Kim's in the next couple weeks with some other (prettier) quilts to do the quilting on her long-arm machine.

...may there be mercy and the UAQ be a much loved treasure for the one who loved these fabrics.

happy new year!

...may there be mercy and moments of great joy for each of us this new year.

merry christmas

...may there be mercy and joy in your celebrations.

quick thoughts

Quick thoughts for this evening.

Kim's party: huge success. Huge. In spite of tacky and rude people. I let all that go and just celebrated my friend and the fact she was well enough to enjoy her party. Everyone had a great time.

Thanksgiving:  fun time in spite of the change in plans. We did not go to Portland as is our usual custom. Our friend's son is deployed and the daughter-in-law is far too pregnant to travel that far and also chase her 18-month-old daughter. So we met at the daughter-in-law's house and brought the party to her. We did all the cooking and cleanup, but there was much love and laughter. It was good.

UAQ: thanks to the ladies at Kim's party, I got a solution to the UAQ and am hoping to finish it soon. It will always be the UAQ in my eyes, but at least it will be the completed UAQ!

Like I said, it's quick tonight. I want some of our usual Saturday night "man, movie and wine" time.

...may there be mercy and joy in the quick moments of life.

tacky and rude

So... I'm planning a birthday party for Kim. It's going to be Saturday. In spite of the fact she's been so sick, she wants a group of quilters to get together and spend the day quilting together. Fun idea, right?

The local quilt shop has recently expanded and added a nice classroom. In anticipation of this room being used - and in the thought of renting it out for fun events like this - until the end of the year, the owner is letting clients "rent" the room at no charge. Cool!  Room holds 10 people, has cutting stations set up, ironing stations set up and a tiny kitchen area. Perfect for an all day quilting party with lots of great munchies - a continental breakfast, snacks, lunch and a special birthday sweet treat for Kim. Brownies being her favorite, I've been planning on what types to make.

Unfortunately, sometimes people are thoughtless, rude and tacky.

Invitations went out with a request for an RSVP by Saturday the 15th... last Saturday, in fact. Heard from most folks by Sunday that they would come. Cool!

Except for that person who said, "can I invite this other person?  She feels like she is close to Kim and would like to come." Huh? Now when I have been invited to a party, I have always been appreciative of the invitation and given my answer without asking to invite others. Especially when there will be food that must be prepared for a group! My mama always taught me that it would be tacky to ask if I could bring someone if the invitation did not specifically say that I could. 

And there is that other little mean thought in my head that the person feels close to Kim... but Kim apparently doesn't feel quite as close or she would have been on that invitation list, eh? 

Oh, and then there is the other person who assumed that because the invitation was addressed to her partner, she is invited also... and she rather rudely braced me on the issue today on the phone. I didn't exclude her because of her status as the "husband" in the relationship. I excluded her because I was not given her name on the invitation list - because Kim doesn't like her and she does not quilt. 

Why would you want to force your way into a quilting party if you don't quilt? I understand she tends to take over any gathering and make it all about herself instead of the actual reason for the gathering. Ugh!

Then there are those who have been calling Kim to invite others to her party... when the invitations clearly state that I am the hostess and contact person. I mean, really, the party is FOR Kim, not being given BY Kim. Why the heck are you calling her?? Sheesh!

So I'm in a crappy mood now because my friend has been so ill and we have been so looking forward to her party... and there are a few people who are being thoughtless and rude and who may take over the party and make it about them instead of Kim. And I'm upset because Kim is disappointed already by her friends. 

It was supposed to be a joyous celebration of our friendship with Kim. Now I just want it over.

But I have to get all the extra food prepped first.

...may there be mercy and joy in spite of tacky.

still concerned, but progress

A quickie post before work. Talked to Kim. Friday they popped her butt back into the hospital and drained off an equal amount of fluid from her lungs as the first time. She still doesn't have any answers, but her doctor appointment is today.

If they do not have a treatment plan that will work and a specific cause, she is going to be heading down to the University of Washington Medical Center.

I'm so relieved they have that plan in place!

...may there be mercy and some answers soon.

very concerned

Kim has had a return of the fluid on both heart and lungs... and now has pneumonia on top of it all. I'm not happy about this and, quite frankly, am very concerned.

...may there be mercy and healing for my dear friend.

quick rambles

Just a couple quick rambling thoughts for this Saturday morning.

Boeing:  we're heading out to do the contract vote in the next 10 minutes. At the end of today, we will know if it got approved. If it goes as we think and is approved, my sweet husband will go back to work on Monday.

My work:  after a high-stress day yesterday, it was sweet to come home with no one laid off and no pay cuts for staff. Hallelujah!!! Well, there was that pay cut that comes from our office benefit package that - for the first time ever - asked staff to pay 30% of the premium for spouse/dependent medical insurance. Company still pays 70% of that premium and 100% of the premium for the employee. Since my sweet husband has medical insurance available at his work, it does not affect our income at all. We elected to decline coverage at my office for him.

Friends:  have spent this week visiting friends in the hospital. Nancy had a tumor removed. They could not determine pre-surgery if it was on the kidney or intestine, so they removed a small portion of her kidney and a small portion of her intestine. Ended up being in the intestine and benign. Hallelujah! She took a while to stop having post-surgical complications, but went home yesterday and will be fine. Anytime they tell you that you do not have cancer, you will be fine!

Kim has been very ill. She had fluid around her heart and on (not in) her lungs. She was admitted to the hospital in the "progressive care" unit on Tuesday. Progressive Care is one step down from Critical Care. Yikes! Wednesday they removed almost a gallon of fluid from her lungs. It was amazing the difference in her color and breathing that night. Thursday they removed about 12 oz of fluid from her heart. This is a lot since there should only be about 2 tablespoons worth there. Again, her color and breathing were dramatically changed... but they moved her to Critical Care post-procedure. Scared the daylights out of me until I found out that this is normal protocol for this procedure. She was better last night, but really pissed off that she was still in the hospital. They will do another couple tests today and hopefully have final determination of the underlying causes for her. Once they know, she can go home.

Okay, those weren't such quick rambles and now I've got to run so we can play a bit today.

...may there be mercy and quick healing for my dear friends - and a calm, less-stressful week next week!

It really all boiled down to this one question:  would you sign an employment contract that clearly stated your employer could - at any time and for any reason - give away your job to someone who did not even work at your place of employment? (It's called outsourcing.)

Of course you wouldn't.

Sadly, the media did not talk much about this part of the Boeing strike. They consistently reported the strike as "issues of wages and medical benefits."

Thanks much, media. Would you have signed that contract with your station?

Yes, negotiating a good financial and benefit package was important. It is in any contract negotiation. But this time it was more important to negotiate the actual jobs, the job security issue and keeping those jobs for employees who actually work for the company. The folks who made them so very profitable. Oh, yeah, those guys.

Thanks to the media almost non-reporting of this most important part of the reason for the strike, I've had 53 days of verbal abuse by a boatload of folks. 

No, I don't work at Boeing. Never have. But my sweet husband does. And yes, he has been on strike for 53 days and counting.

The most recent abusive comment to me:  You guys are just greedy, selfish bastards! You should be grateful to have any job at any pay in this economy. What gives you the right to strike against your employer? Do you realize how many people are losing their jobs and taking cuts in pay? Greedy sons of...

Well, you get the general drift of that one. It went on. Sadly, it was another comment from yet  another friend. I didn't even respond. I was too tired of being the punching bag for the anger of those who didn't care to find out if there was another side of the story.

Thanks much, media.

For those who don't know, yes. I actually do understand all too well the fear behind those comments.  Come Friday, my own job may be cut or my pay cut. We will find out at a meeting that day. With my health, the most important part of everything is the issue of health insurance availability. Currently our insurance is held with my job, so it's been pretty dang scary at times. But I am trusting that God will provide for our needs. It's what I believe. It's what I'm living.

As of last night, a tentative agreement has been reached between the Boeing Company and the Machinists Union. In preliminary information, it's looking pretty dang good for both sides. As soon as we get a full copy, we'll read the fine print to be sure. But from all the reports, it's looking like it will be a winner.

It's been interesting lately. A week or so ago, I moved into "refuse to discuss" and self protective mode. I know people are simply scared and taking it out on me. I'm trying to avoid damaged relationships, so I won't talk about it with anyone now. Hoping that once the guys go back to work, people will focus on something else and we can move past the hurtful things said.

...may there be mercy and a grace in forgiveness.

lovely weekend

We're just home from the Fall Color Festival.  Too bad there wasn't any color yet!! In about 2-3 weeks, the color will be glorious. Today, the day was glorious, but the color was just starting to turn. Oh well, we had a fun time anyway.

The plan was to take our cameras, pick up a buddy from work and go enjoy this festival. Since the color wasn't cooperative, we never got our cameras out of the trunk. Big disappointment on that, because I really wanted some picture taking time today.

I'm embarrassed to admit that we've never visited the local wineries, with the exception of the one that is across the street from my friend's house - and that one only when they have had events raising money for breast cancer research.

The first winery, Eagle Haven, is the closest on the drive upriver. It's a young winery, only open since 2004. The tasting room is cozy and inviting and pretty. The staff is just plain fun. Obviously they enjoy people and are knowledgeable about wine - in spite of the fact that the employee today in the tasting room really is a whiskey drinker! We laughed with her, learned a little about this winery and enjoyed a relaxed and fun tasting. This is the first year they are selling a Pinot Noir. It's young, so it's a little on the light side rather than full bodied, but it does show they have potential. The Sangiovese was lovely and I brought a bottle of that home. I will go back there again.

The second winery, Challenger Ridge, is in a pretty setting overlooking the river. The tasting room is very pretty, however it's quite dark and has the feel of a smoky jazz bar with a slightly odd twist of being back-woodsy. We were told they are planning for the future in that they want to become a destination winery with a bed and breakfast, restaurant, etc. Great plan! We need a destination winery.

It's too bad that we felt they are a bit stingy! The person running the tasting room had a great personality, but gave very small tastes - small enough that I didn't feel anyone could really get a sense of what their wines actually taste like. I've never seen a winery that only poured enough to show a little bit of color in the bottom of the glass... really just wetting the glass and a sip more. I told my sweet husband that the two sips worth of wine were not real sips, just "wet your lips" sips. Not enough to taste the wine and determine if I liked it.

The other thing she did that turned us off was that she raved and raved about how their Cabernet Sauvignon is wonderful, the best seller, etc. - but oh, sorry, "we're not tasting that one today." Huh?? She had a full tasting room, about 10 people, half of whom wanted to taste it (most of whom would have probably purchased it) and refused based on the fact they would not be open in the tasting room for the next several days. To save the cost of the leftovers of a single bottle of wine, she threw away the profit on at least 5 bottles. Actually more since there were more folks in there at the time. Everyone in the tasting room at the time thanked her for the tasting and walked away without buying a thing. Not the way to get that plan of a destination winery going!

The last winery was Glacier Peak Winery. Probably the loveliest setting of the 3 wineries, surrounded by mountain peaks and boasting a glorious view of Glacier Peak. The tasting room is a bit of a letdown visually and is nothing special in the way of decor, but is light and open. The person running the tasting room didn't have the personality of the other 2, but she was pleasant and knowledgeable. While we would not make that long a drive to this winery again, we did enjoy their Glacier Red wine made from Hungarian Agria grapes. It's a bit on the sweet side, but has a surprising hint of pepper to counteract the sweet. They sell it as a dessert wine and it will be good with sharp cheeses or rich dark chocolate sometime this winter. Definitely in front of the fireplace!

As we headed back down river, we realized that we had not visited the Apple Shed at Perkins Apple Orchard... on the same property as Eagle Haven Winery! Silly us! Yep, we stopped back there on the way down. Sue, one of the owners and the Grandma/matriarch of the family was manning the Apple Shed. She was adorable! She cut apple tastes for us from about 10 different varieties of apples. Yum! Some of the varietals of apples I'd never heard of, but enjoyed immensely. They also sell honey from hives on the property and apple cider. Walked out of there with 4 pounds of Jonagolds, 4 pounds of Arlets and a gallon of fresh cider - so fresh that it was pressed this morning.

After dropping my buddy off at her house, we headed for home and some quiet time. It's been a busy, but very fun weekend for us. A little time tonight of "man, movie and wine" will complete the weekend nicely, allowing me to return to work refreshed.

...may there be mercy and many weekends like this one.

lots o' stuff

Okay, here comes the monster update on life, living, friends from all over the place, health, work and more boring stuff than one could imagine. But the summer blogging didn't happen and some have been asking me for updates. Here goes.

Work: Well, that's the interesting thing for us right now. My sweet husband is on strike. Has been for a month. Remember all the weekends he worked overtime during the summer? Yep, that was the strike fund so we would be prepared and could survive financially. Thus far, we have not had to touch the strike fund at all. Hallelujah! If things continue as is - with us living carefully - we think we will have to raid it around November 1st. Hopefully the strike doesn't last that long. I'd really rather use the strike fun to remodel the bathroom!

With the current economy, my work is so slow that we expect a layoff there. It will be interesting to see what happens. Will the board allow the layoff of the 2-3 lowest paid and least knowledgeable folks? If so a board member's daughter will be laid off. Will the accountant determine that we must lay off folks with higher salaries and more knowledge? If so, then I fall squarely in that range of possible people. We just do not know what will happen... but we have made plans for any "just in case" issues. I'm one of the extreme few in the office who is not afraid. Don't get me wrong, the tension is so big that no one is stress-free. It's just that we have worked out what to do if it is me, so we are okay.

Friends: It's been an amazing summer of time with friends from all over the country. Scoot was here from Alabama and we spent a glorious day with Carrie in Seattle. One of those spectacular Seattle summer days with great weather, lots of laughter and an incredible lunch where we were treated like royalty. Then, 2 weeks later, Melissa from Florida and SuziQOregon surprised me... as y'all read about earlier in my blog about rockin' friends. Still can hardly believe they pulled it off and how lovely it is to have friends who will do something that outrageous - just for me. Love you guys!

Another 2 weeks and sweet Karen from Mississippi came to visit with her nice husband. It was such a fun weekend showing them the areas we enjoy, talking, laughing, eating way too much and getting a big kick out of their enjoyment of our very contemporary church that is so very different than their more traditional churches in the South. Hearing sweet Karen's glorious voice raised in song during church is one of my precious memories of the summer.

Another 3 weeks and we head down to Portland for an impromptu party to celebrate my friend Terry's 50th birthday. It was tons of fun, mostly because Terry is like my brother and we always egg one another on until one of us laughs so hard tears run down the face.

My friend Jenna got married in August in one of the most beautiful ceremonies I've seen. Over lunch - or was it breakfast - early in her engagement I gave her a bit of advise. Ensure that the last couple days before the wedding are errand and duty free so that you can be a very relaxed bride, prepared for your celebration both public and private. I was proud to see how she took that advise to heart and how it impacted her day. She was a joyful, relaxed and stress-free (not to mention stunningly gorgeous) bride. The ceremony and reception were filled with meaning and family and joy. It was my great honor to be celebrating with them!

Family: my dumb-ass brother is back on drugs and living on the street with the "will work for food" sign, where he makes almost $300.00 per day so he can buy his damn drugs. I'm angry at him and totally heartbroken at how he has thrown away his life, once again. When he gets arrested, and he will, he will then have to face up the the California 3 strikes law... and spend the rest of his life in prison. My family is so torn up by him, again. People keep calling Mama to tell her they have seen him. I'm angry with them, too. The first time someone calls is bad enough, although I could excuse it because the motivation could very well be letting Mama know that he is alive. But the 6th time the same person calls - within a month's time - just speaks to the fact that the person can't get enough of humiliating Mama. Heartbreaking all around.

Health: My sweet husband is being treated for a terrible case of varicose veins. Bad enough that the doc is trying a bunch of different treatments, but expects to have to do surgery anyway. Gotta go through the gyrations for the insurance company. Not life threatening, thankfully, but painful and a pain in the butt for him nonetheless.

I've been diagnosed with genetically induced high blood pressure. Thanks to both Mama and Bud, my birth father. Yep, I called them both to thank them for sharing. We were all surprised that it hit me so early, but taking a single pill each day is far better than having a stroke, eh? Besides, if I had a stroke, I probably couldn't quilt! Due to the high blood pressure, I've finally gotten serious about exercise and am walking 3 miles each morning before work. It's been good for me to do this. Between the meds, walking, eating better and losing a few pounds, I'm feeling better than I have in years. Yay!

Quilting: Not a lot has happened for a while. I'm stuck. It's the dang ugly-ass quilt (UAQ) that I'm making for my sister-in-law. I made the mistake of letting her pick the fabrics... and they do not go together at all. In fact, the ones that do go together end up looking muddy and boring, then add in the other fabrics that do not coordinate and you get the UAQ. I made myself get to a point on it and I'm stuck. I do not want to work on the UAQ, but I won't let myself work on anything else until it's done. Including Christmas gifts, which will need to be sent out in about 60 days. Yikes!!! I may have to put the UAQ aside until after Christmas and get it done in time for her birthday in March. We shall see.

Life: in spite of all the oddities and stressors above, we are happy and doing well. Yay! Our needs are met and we are spending time with one another, enjoying conversation and all the other good stuff.

And now my dinner is almost done, so I will go pull it out of the oven, pour a lovely glass of wine for us and do some of that enjoying with my sweet husband. It's good.

...may there be mercy and continued recognition of the good, in spite of any stress.

ping

Just a ping to note that I'm still here, just been crazy busy.

Really need to do a monster sized blog about my friends coming to visit from Mississippi, health issues, life, the ugly-ass quilt I'm making for my sister-in-law and other oddities of life.

Soon. But today I have to meet my friend for lunch and hear all about her life as a newlywed!

...may there be mercy and some time for rest soon.

rockin' friends

So... a couple months ago, my dear friend SuziQOregon emailed me to discuss the possibility of a Girls Weekend. Her husband is a runner who does the Hood To Coast Relay. Her thinking is that since she's done the supportive wife thing already, why don't we have fun instead. I'm totally on board with this plan! My sweet husband will probably have to work anyway. We set our plans for her to come up here and both got excited about having the time together.

In the interim time, I'm on the phone with our mutual friend, Mel, who lives in Florida. During the course of the conversation, I learn that Mel has some flyer miles that need to be used before October. I encourage Mel to check her calendar to see if it would work for her to come here during the Girls Weekend. Let's surprise SuziQOregon! Mel checks her calendar, only to discover that she had already lined up a business trip for that weekend. Dang!

SuziQOregon and I continue to anticipate a fun and yet relaxing weekend. I find a cool bottle of wine for her. That's the thing we do. Most times when we see one another, we give a gift of wine. Some very fun bottles have been exchanged!

Finally, Saturday morning arrives and I'm at the restaurant, impatiently waiting for her to arrive. I'm distracted by the fact I've agreed to loan some stadium chairs to a co-worker who is picking them up from me at that same time. SuziQ walks in as my co-worker is leaving. Big squeals and hugs! She says, "I'm sorry I didn't bring you a bottle of wine today, but I thought you'd like this better." She steps aside.

Standing behind her is Mel from Florida!!!

More squeals and hugs and I am rendered completely speechless! (y'all know how hard that is do to to me!) I'm overwhelmed and tearful and amazed that they pulled off this absolute surprise for me. Apparently they had been planning it from before the time SuziQ emailed me in the first place. Totally cool!

SuziQ and Mel have been listening to my heart. They have heard about the loss of a long term relationship and have helped me in my grief over that loss. They have listened and encouraged me during the stress-filled moments of this year. To be completely honest, they have done so for longer than that. They put their love and friendship into a practical application of a joyful time together.

I'm still overwhelmed at how fantastic the weekend was for us. We have these great memories of our time... even if we never made it to the Casino or Applebee's. But we did see the Muffin Man, so it's all good.

...may there be mercy and blessings poured out on my precious, rockin' friends.

little old folk

Bob... he's 85 and walks faster than I do. (my pace is 3.5 - 4 miles per hour) He's been Mall Walking every day for 15 years. He's the encourager of the morning crew. Walks with everyone, matching his pace to theirs. Getting folks to move while he finds out their stories and loves them.

Jack... he's 90 and walks slower than most anybody. But he walks... leaned over, slow as the turtle and greeting everyone with a smile. His handshake is still firm and pleasing.

Dale... he's old and crabby, the stereotypical "grouchy old man". When I asked him how he was the other day, he told me "I always hurt when I walk". It obviously makes him mad, but he does it anyway. Brutally honest, but persevering in spite of cancer. He teased me today and I thought that a wonderful thing.

Arlo... he's a flirt! "Good morning, pretty ladies" is his byline. To us, in our late 40's or to the other ladies who are well into their 60's and 70's. But when you talk to him, he always mentions his beloved wife, who passed 10 years ago. And there is always a tear because he loves her still.

George... he walks with a cane and his carriage is still erect, more so than most. He forgets a lot, but not to come to the mall and walk. The other little old men look after him and make sure he is okay.

Dee... she's mid-50's and walks fast! She told me that she used to walk at the mall years and years ago, and that the same little old men were walking back then. It's cool to hear that.

Mila... she's a professional woman, 60's, who walks at a good clip and seems a no-nonsense person. Yet, she's got a frivolous side because she revealed her vanity when she told me she wished her hair would do like mine does when it looks nice curly or straight.

Rosemary and Zach... in their 70's, they walk together. I think they are married, but I'm not sure. She is a painter whose projects I've seen exhibited. Beautiful! He has lost his voicebox and speaks with the aid of technology. Their smiles are joyful.

Mr. "T"... can't really name him because he is my boss's dad. He walks like a bulldog, and can't quite figure out how I know who he is (or how I know when his birthday was!), but he moves along at a great clip in spite of injuries to his leg from an infected spider bite.

Mrs. "T" and the girls... she's my boss's mom and walks with 2 clients of mine. They chatter and laugh and keep themselves fit in their late 60's, early 70's. It's glorious to see their smiles and hear their laughter!


There are others who walk in the mornings at the mall and are only faces yet. But... they are faces that I know and care about already. They look for us in the mornings. They ask about either of us if we are missing. They care.

...may there be mercy and joy in the presence of those who are older.

it ended!

After 4 weeks, the neverending garage sale has finally ended. As I drove home this evening, I watched them put the last item on a truck. The yard is cleaned up.

Really too bad there wasn't anything interesting enough to stop and see what all the hullaballooo was about.

Also really too bad that they didn't sell more stuff because that truck was loaded to the gills.

...may there be mercy if they are moving and nice new neighbors.

neverending garage sale

About 3 weeks ago, some neighbors put what seemed like everything they own out in the yard for a garage sale. As I passed by that weekend, many things left and the amount of items lessened.

And then it started.

More things came outside and were placed into the yard. A few things were gone that night. For about 10 days, more items appeared each day, with just a few things leaving. Then... another 10 days when nothing new came out, but each day a few things were gone.

Today, a boatload more items came into the yard!

Yep, neverending garage sale is here! I watch it with interest because the things that look like they might actually be useful are still there, 3 weeks later, but the things that I consider garbage are gone within what seems like moments.

Trash or treasure, it's all about perspective.

...may there be mercy and a good sale (with a cleaned up yard soon!) for my neighbors.

tough day

We lost another friend and co-worker today, the second one in about 8 week's time.

Dwight lost his battle with pancreatic cancer. His wife said that it was a peaceful passing.

We will miss this lovely man.

...may there be mercy in mourning and comfort for his family.

baby steps

This whole making better choices thing can be really hard to do. It's just so dang easy to grab anything that is convenient to eat or to decide I'm too tired to get up and exercise.

But... the good news is that I am doing it!

Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely enjoying myself some days with extra treats. But did you notice that it's "some days" and not all day, every day? Yep, that is some huge progress for me. Especially the part where I am deliberately choosing to have a piece of fruit instead of a candy bar when I want sweets!

I'm also getting up at 5 a.m. every work day in order to get awake enough (and coffee'd up enough!) to meet a coworker at the mall for a 2.5 mile walk. Yep, I'm officially one of the "Little Old Lady Mall Walkers" now. I find it hilarious and am enjoying the time.

One thing that I've decided in all this... for the moment, until I get myself back to a healthier normal, I'm not worrying about my weight. Now that does not mean I'm eating myself into oblivion. Instead, I'm making far more healthy food choices, but not worrying about the scale or following my Weight Watchers plan.

More important for me to concentrate on the input of healthy foods, getting my exercise and ensuring my sleep. This body has not been cooperative lately and I do not like that at all!!

One thing at a time and baby steps. Once I'm back into a healthier mindset on what I am doing for intake, rest and exercise... then I'll take the next step and start journaling food again... and adding portion control back in, along with figuring out exactly how people really do stop eating when their bodies are full.

...may there be mercy in the baby steps.

day 3

It's day 3 of the planned taking better care of myself. Days 1 & 2 were not too difficult. The hardest part is for me to avoid sugar...

...and today it's hitting a little harder with the sugar cravings.

Sleep has been a terrible problem. Had to resort to a couple nights of sleeping pills to get myself rested and refreshed enough to be able to think and function at all. Today is much better for functioning.

Am making the decision to eat healthy foods, in spite of what I want!

... may there be mercy in a return to healthy choices.

rested and refreshed

Yep, we are home from our travels and feeling quite rested and refreshed. Tomorrow will bring us back to the confines of reality. But I don't care. It's been a great time off for us!

...may there be mercy as we return to our normal jobs.

now!

Ahhhhh! Vacation time has finally arrived.

That packing thing is just about done and I'm just about done in for the night. We have a couple little things to do, then it's wind down and get to sleep. We're heading out early.

Back in a week with the Days of Wine and Railways report.

...may there be mercy and rest as we get away.

soon...

24 working hours until vacation! Not that I'm counting or anything! ;-p

This is a link to part of the fun things we will be doing on our trip: http://www.alberniheritage.com/

Yep, gotta please the train guy!

And of course, there will be winery visits. This is one: http://www.cherrypointvineyards.com/

It looks cool to me because it is one of a very few in the world that is aboriginal owned and operated.

I'm ready now! Well, except for that packing thing. Soon.

...may there be mercy and joy in our time off together.