So... a couple months ago, my dear friend SuziQOregon emailed me to discuss the possibility of a Girls Weekend. Her husband is a runner who does the Hood To Coast Relay. Her thinking is that since she's done the supportive wife thing already, why don't we have fun instead. I'm totally on board with this plan! My sweet husband will probably have to work anyway. We set our plans for her to come up here and both got excited about having the time together.
In the interim time, I'm on the phone with our mutual friend, Mel, who lives in Florida. During the course of the conversation, I learn that Mel has some flyer miles that need to be used before October. I encourage Mel to check her calendar to see if it would work for her to come here during the Girls Weekend. Let's surprise SuziQOregon! Mel checks her calendar, only to discover that she had already lined up a business trip for that weekend. Dang!
SuziQOregon and I continue to anticipate a fun and yet relaxing weekend. I find a cool bottle of wine for her. That's the thing we do. Most times when we see one another, we give a gift of wine. Some very fun bottles have been exchanged!
Finally, Saturday morning arrives and I'm at the restaurant, impatiently waiting for her to arrive. I'm distracted by the fact I've agreed to loan some stadium chairs to a co-worker who is picking them up from me at that same time. SuziQ walks in as my co-worker is leaving. Big squeals and hugs! She says, "I'm sorry I didn't bring you a bottle of wine today, but I thought you'd like this better." She steps aside.
Standing behind her is Mel from Florida!!!
More squeals and hugs and I am rendered completely speechless! (y'all know how hard that is do to to me!) I'm overwhelmed and tearful and amazed that they pulled off this absolute surprise for me. Apparently they had been planning it from before the time SuziQ emailed me in the first place. Totally cool!
SuziQ and Mel have been listening to my heart. They have heard about the loss of a long term relationship and have helped me in my grief over that loss. They have listened and encouraged me during the stress-filled moments of this year. To be completely honest, they have done so for longer than that. They put their love and friendship into a practical application of a joyful time together.
I'm still overwhelmed at how fantastic the weekend was for us. We have these great memories of our time... even if we never made it to the Casino or Applebee's. But we did see the Muffin Man, so it's all good.
...may there be mercy and blessings poured out on my precious, rockin' friends.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Friday, August 22, 2008
little old folk
Bob... he's 85 and walks faster than I do. (my pace is 3.5 - 4 miles per hour) He's been Mall Walking every day for 15 years. He's the encourager of the morning crew. Walks with everyone, matching his pace to theirs. Getting folks to move while he finds out their stories and loves them.
Jack... he's 90 and walks slower than most anybody. But he walks... leaned over, slow as the turtle and greeting everyone with a smile. His handshake is still firm and pleasing.
Dale... he's old and crabby, the stereotypical "grouchy old man". When I asked him how he was the other day, he told me "I always hurt when I walk". It obviously makes him mad, but he does it anyway. Brutally honest, but persevering in spite of cancer. He teased me today and I thought that a wonderful thing.
Arlo... he's a flirt! "Good morning, pretty ladies" is his byline. To us, in our late 40's or to the other ladies who are well into their 60's and 70's. But when you talk to him, he always mentions his beloved wife, who passed 10 years ago. And there is always a tear because he loves her still.
George... he walks with a cane and his carriage is still erect, more so than most. He forgets a lot, but not to come to the mall and walk. The other little old men look after him and make sure he is okay.
Dee... she's mid-50's and walks fast! She told me that she used to walk at the mall years and years ago, and that the same little old men were walking back then. It's cool to hear that.
Mila... she's a professional woman, 60's, who walks at a good clip and seems a no-nonsense person. Yet, she's got a frivolous side because she revealed her vanity when she told me she wished her hair would do like mine does when it looks nice curly or straight.
Rosemary and Zach... in their 70's, they walk together. I think they are married, but I'm not sure. She is a painter whose projects I've seen exhibited. Beautiful! He has lost his voicebox and speaks with the aid of technology. Their smiles are joyful.
Mr. "T"... can't really name him because he is my boss's dad. He walks like a bulldog, and can't quite figure out how I know who he is (or how I know when his birthday was!), but he moves along at a great clip in spite of injuries to his leg from an infected spider bite.
Mrs. "T" and the girls... she's my boss's mom and walks with 2 clients of mine. They chatter and laugh and keep themselves fit in their late 60's, early 70's. It's glorious to see their smiles and hear their laughter!
There are others who walk in the mornings at the mall and are only faces yet. But... they are faces that I know and care about already. They look for us in the mornings. They ask about either of us if we are missing. They care.
...may there be mercy and joy in the presence of those who are older.
Jack... he's 90 and walks slower than most anybody. But he walks... leaned over, slow as the turtle and greeting everyone with a smile. His handshake is still firm and pleasing.
Dale... he's old and crabby, the stereotypical "grouchy old man". When I asked him how he was the other day, he told me "I always hurt when I walk". It obviously makes him mad, but he does it anyway. Brutally honest, but persevering in spite of cancer. He teased me today and I thought that a wonderful thing.
Arlo... he's a flirt! "Good morning, pretty ladies" is his byline. To us, in our late 40's or to the other ladies who are well into their 60's and 70's. But when you talk to him, he always mentions his beloved wife, who passed 10 years ago. And there is always a tear because he loves her still.
George... he walks with a cane and his carriage is still erect, more so than most. He forgets a lot, but not to come to the mall and walk. The other little old men look after him and make sure he is okay.
Dee... she's mid-50's and walks fast! She told me that she used to walk at the mall years and years ago, and that the same little old men were walking back then. It's cool to hear that.
Mila... she's a professional woman, 60's, who walks at a good clip and seems a no-nonsense person. Yet, she's got a frivolous side because she revealed her vanity when she told me she wished her hair would do like mine does when it looks nice curly or straight.
Rosemary and Zach... in their 70's, they walk together. I think they are married, but I'm not sure. She is a painter whose projects I've seen exhibited. Beautiful! He has lost his voicebox and speaks with the aid of technology. Their smiles are joyful.
Mr. "T"... can't really name him because he is my boss's dad. He walks like a bulldog, and can't quite figure out how I know who he is (or how I know when his birthday was!), but he moves along at a great clip in spite of injuries to his leg from an infected spider bite.
Mrs. "T" and the girls... she's my boss's mom and walks with 2 clients of mine. They chatter and laugh and keep themselves fit in their late 60's, early 70's. It's glorious to see their smiles and hear their laughter!
There are others who walk in the mornings at the mall and are only faces yet. But... they are faces that I know and care about already. They look for us in the mornings. They ask about either of us if we are missing. They care.
...may there be mercy and joy in the presence of those who are older.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
it ended!
After 4 weeks, the neverending garage sale has finally ended. As I drove home this evening, I watched them put the last item on a truck. The yard is cleaned up.
Really too bad there wasn't anything interesting enough to stop and see what all the hullaballooo was about.
Also really too bad that they didn't sell more stuff because that truck was loaded to the gills.
...may there be mercy if they are moving and nice new neighbors.
Really too bad there wasn't anything interesting enough to stop and see what all the hullaballooo was about.
Also really too bad that they didn't sell more stuff because that truck was loaded to the gills.
...may there be mercy if they are moving and nice new neighbors.
Friday, August 15, 2008
neverending garage sale
About 3 weeks ago, some neighbors put what seemed like everything they own out in the yard for a garage sale. As I passed by that weekend, many things left and the amount of items lessened.
And then it started.
More things came outside and were placed into the yard. A few things were gone that night. For about 10 days, more items appeared each day, with just a few things leaving. Then... another 10 days when nothing new came out, but each day a few things were gone.
Today, a boatload more items came into the yard!
Yep, neverending garage sale is here! I watch it with interest because the things that look like they might actually be useful are still there, 3 weeks later, but the things that I consider garbage are gone within what seems like moments.
Trash or treasure, it's all about perspective.
...may there be mercy and a good sale (with a cleaned up yard soon!) for my neighbors.
And then it started.
More things came outside and were placed into the yard. A few things were gone that night. For about 10 days, more items appeared each day, with just a few things leaving. Then... another 10 days when nothing new came out, but each day a few things were gone.
Today, a boatload more items came into the yard!
Yep, neverending garage sale is here! I watch it with interest because the things that look like they might actually be useful are still there, 3 weeks later, but the things that I consider garbage are gone within what seems like moments.
Trash or treasure, it's all about perspective.
...may there be mercy and a good sale (with a cleaned up yard soon!) for my neighbors.
Monday, August 11, 2008
tough day
We lost another friend and co-worker today, the second one in about 8 week's time.
Dwight lost his battle with pancreatic cancer. His wife said that it was a peaceful passing.
We will miss this lovely man.
...may there be mercy in mourning and comfort for his family.
Dwight lost his battle with pancreatic cancer. His wife said that it was a peaceful passing.
We will miss this lovely man.
...may there be mercy in mourning and comfort for his family.
Sunday, August 03, 2008
baby steps
This whole making better choices thing can be really hard to do. It's just so dang easy to grab anything that is convenient to eat or to decide I'm too tired to get up and exercise.
But... the good news is that I am doing it!
Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely enjoying myself some days with extra treats. But did you notice that it's "some days" and not all day, every day? Yep, that is some huge progress for me. Especially the part where I am deliberately choosing to have a piece of fruit instead of a candy bar when I want sweets!
I'm also getting up at 5 a.m. every work day in order to get awake enough (and coffee'd up enough!) to meet a coworker at the mall for a 2.5 mile walk. Yep, I'm officially one of the "Little Old Lady Mall Walkers" now. I find it hilarious and am enjoying the time.
One thing that I've decided in all this... for the moment, until I get myself back to a healthier normal, I'm not worrying about my weight. Now that does not mean I'm eating myself into oblivion. Instead, I'm making far more healthy food choices, but not worrying about the scale or following my Weight Watchers plan.
More important for me to concentrate on the input of healthy foods, getting my exercise and ensuring my sleep. This body has not been cooperative lately and I do not like that at all!!
One thing at a time and baby steps. Once I'm back into a healthier mindset on what I am doing for intake, rest and exercise... then I'll take the next step and start journaling food again... and adding portion control back in, along with figuring out exactly how people really do stop eating when their bodies are full.
...may there be mercy in the baby steps.
But... the good news is that I am doing it!
Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely enjoying myself some days with extra treats. But did you notice that it's "some days" and not all day, every day? Yep, that is some huge progress for me. Especially the part where I am deliberately choosing to have a piece of fruit instead of a candy bar when I want sweets!
I'm also getting up at 5 a.m. every work day in order to get awake enough (and coffee'd up enough!) to meet a coworker at the mall for a 2.5 mile walk. Yep, I'm officially one of the "Little Old Lady Mall Walkers" now. I find it hilarious and am enjoying the time.
One thing that I've decided in all this... for the moment, until I get myself back to a healthier normal, I'm not worrying about my weight. Now that does not mean I'm eating myself into oblivion. Instead, I'm making far more healthy food choices, but not worrying about the scale or following my Weight Watchers plan.
More important for me to concentrate on the input of healthy foods, getting my exercise and ensuring my sleep. This body has not been cooperative lately and I do not like that at all!!
One thing at a time and baby steps. Once I'm back into a healthier mindset on what I am doing for intake, rest and exercise... then I'll take the next step and start journaling food again... and adding portion control back in, along with figuring out exactly how people really do stop eating when their bodies are full.
...may there be mercy in the baby steps.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
day 3
It's day 3 of the planned taking better care of myself. Days 1 & 2 were not too difficult. The hardest part is for me to avoid sugar...
...and today it's hitting a little harder with the sugar cravings.
Sleep has been a terrible problem. Had to resort to a couple nights of sleeping pills to get myself rested and refreshed enough to be able to think and function at all. Today is much better for functioning.
Am making the decision to eat healthy foods, in spite of what I want!
... may there be mercy in a return to healthy choices.
...and today it's hitting a little harder with the sugar cravings.
Sleep has been a terrible problem. Had to resort to a couple nights of sleeping pills to get myself rested and refreshed enough to be able to think and function at all. Today is much better for functioning.
Am making the decision to eat healthy foods, in spite of what I want!
... may there be mercy in a return to healthy choices.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
rested and refreshed
Yep, we are home from our travels and feeling quite rested and refreshed. Tomorrow will bring us back to the confines of reality. But I don't care. It's been a great time off for us!
...may there be mercy as we return to our normal jobs.
...may there be mercy as we return to our normal jobs.
Thursday, July 03, 2008
now!
Ahhhhh! Vacation time has finally arrived.
That packing thing is just about done and I'm just about done in for the night. We have a couple little things to do, then it's wind down and get to sleep. We're heading out early.
Back in a week with the Days of Wine and Railways report.
...may there be mercy and rest as we get away.
That packing thing is just about done and I'm just about done in for the night. We have a couple little things to do, then it's wind down and get to sleep. We're heading out early.
Back in a week with the Days of Wine and Railways report.
...may there be mercy and rest as we get away.
Monday, June 30, 2008
soon...
24 working hours until vacation! Not that I'm counting or anything! ;-p
This is a link to part of the fun things we will be doing on our trip: http://www.alberniheritage.com/
Yep, gotta please the train guy!
And of course, there will be winery visits. This is one: http://www.cherrypointvineyards.com/
It looks cool to me because it is one of a very few in the world that is aboriginal owned and operated.
I'm ready now! Well, except for that packing thing. Soon.
...may there be mercy and joy in our time off together.
This is a link to part of the fun things we will be doing on our trip: http://www.alberniheritage.com/
Yep, gotta please the train guy!
And of course, there will be winery visits. This is one: http://www.cherrypointvineyards.com/
It looks cool to me because it is one of a very few in the world that is aboriginal owned and operated.
I'm ready now! Well, except for that packing thing. Soon.
...may there be mercy and joy in our time off together.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
sick
Ugh!
Crappy, cruddy, we haven't gotten warm enough to really get summer bronchitis-y type virus has hit me - and hard. Today is the first day since Wednesday that I think I might actually live.
...may there be mercy and warm enough weather to bake this out of me...
Crappy, cruddy, we haven't gotten warm enough to really get summer bronchitis-y type virus has hit me - and hard. Today is the first day since Wednesday that I think I might actually live.
...may there be mercy and warm enough weather to bake this out of me...
Saturday, June 14, 2008
time to play
Saturday... I love Saturdays, especially when we can have Sleep In Day and the promise of some fun together. Since my sweet husband has this weekend off, this is one of those lovely Saturdays.
Yay!
...may there be mercy and joy in our day.
Yay!
...may there be mercy and joy in our day.
Monday, June 02, 2008
home...
Home...and so very glad to be here. I’ve missed of my quiet little life and my quiet little home and my sweet husband.
The trip was both good and very difficult. I was so far outside of my comfort zone this trip.
Home...where we have structure and our routine instead of chaos. I’ve missed the normalcy of our life where the day’s activities and mealtimes are mostly planned.
The days there are completely unstructured. Everyone goes to bed and gets up when they want to, even the smaller grandchildren...who may stay up until 2 a.m. playing computer games even when the adults go to bed around 10 p.m. Whatever happens is fine. No planning of any part of the day, whatsoever. Breakfast is anytime from 10 a.m. to noon. Dinner is sometime between 4 p.m. and 10 p.m. - whenever everyone gets hungry enough and my stepmother is ready to fix it. No midday meal, just potato chips and candy available for whenever anyone wants a snack. The biggest events of the day are letting the dogs out to run the property and watering the gardens...whenever they decide to do it.
Home...where even when our home is messy, it is just a simple mess and clutter. I’ve missed feeling clean.
I admit to being a lazy housekeeper at times and a messy person, but I’ve never seen anything like this before. The only word to describe it is squaller. Outside, there are at least a dozen junk cars on the property. Some are just rusting hulks with parts already gleaned from them, some are waiting for dissection. There are 2 buildings that are each equal size to the house - each used for storage of unknown stuff, completely full. Inside the house are pathways to chairs, kitchen, bedrooms, between the bed and the door, etc. No open space at all...mostly I think due to a hoarder mentality. With the exception of the dishes, nothing inside the house has been cleaned since I was there 4 years ago. There are items on shelves that have not been moved in those 4 years, with the accumulated dust and filth of those years showing. The entire house smells of urine since one of the toilets overflows daily. They bathe once a week, brush their teeth twice a week and change clothes about every 4 days. In New Mexico the temperature is about 85 this time of year...and everything there pretty much stinks.
Home...where we have actual quiet and calm. I’ve missed the simplicity of quiet.
I like a good TV show or movie and will usually play my music pretty loudly. There are 5 TV’s at my birth father’s home. All of them are on, 24/7...and loud! There are 7 living grandchildren, any or all of whom are on site at any given time. Everyone is clamoring to be heard over the noise of the TV’s or the other people.
Home...where we have actual conversations with one another instead of thinking out what stories we will tell while the other person is talking. I’ve missed the give and take of a real conversation.
My sweet husband and I sometimes argue that the other person is not listening...but it’s not completely true. We hear one another and respond to the conversation or “spirited discussion” appropriately. There, everyone is so busy thinking up the next story to tell or what they want to say that nobody ever asks a thing about anyone else. It was a time of being talked “at” instead of talked “with”. One would think that a birth family would want to get to know a person...what they think, like, want, do, etc. Apparently it was more important to ignore what I was saying about my life (when I could say anything at all) and tell me more about the things they have done.
Home...where we have openness coupled with caring instead of undercurrents of fear, concern and hostility. I’m so grateful that my sweet husband and I discuss the things in life that make us concerned for one another - whether health, work or just daily things.
My birth father is 82 and starting to fail, but nobody will talk about it. I could see the concern, but it was very obvious that it was not open for discussion even if I had not been there. My sister is just beginning to allow herself to grieve the loss of her 17 year old son who died in November. No one will talk about it with her. Instead, they watch her with deep concern, but will not even ask her how she is doing. I did...and discovered that she is in a self-destructive mode. I am so glad I asked, because we were able to talk through some of her grief and how to get her some help so that she gets out of the self-destructive mode. She will never truly get over the loss of her son, I understand that part, but she needs to be able to cope and move out of self-destruct mode.
Home...where making up after an argument is sweet without requiring a trip to the ER and another argument is waiting on your return.
My sister’s oldest son spent much time with his dad after the divorce. Sadly, he was told many things about his mother that were not true. There is bitterness, resentment, and a large lack of respect. The night before I arrived, they got into a fight and he threw a kitchen chair at her...causing a bruised heel-bone and the need for crutches for the next several weeks or months. Another night while I was there, they got into a yelling fight just after I went to bed. The only way I could cope with their fight was to turn on the fan, put my pillow over my ears and whisper to myself, “shut up, shut up, shut up!” I worry about them both.
Home...where I am loved. I didn’t miss out on being loved.
In spite of all the stuff I’ve written, they love me and are not afraid to show it. There was a little planning to show me the areas they tell me about - where they hunt elk for meat, where they camp, where they log trees for firewood - going 4-wheeling in those areas, and also a massive family BBQ where we laughed and teased one another. Even me, as if I’d lived there always. I wish this post didn’t sound so judgmental. I love them and am glad I went. The contrast between our lives is just so harsh.
Home...
...may there be mercy as I process all the emotions of this trip.
The trip was both good and very difficult. I was so far outside of my comfort zone this trip.
Home...where we have structure and our routine instead of chaos. I’ve missed the normalcy of our life where the day’s activities and mealtimes are mostly planned.
The days there are completely unstructured. Everyone goes to bed and gets up when they want to, even the smaller grandchildren...who may stay up until 2 a.m. playing computer games even when the adults go to bed around 10 p.m. Whatever happens is fine. No planning of any part of the day, whatsoever. Breakfast is anytime from 10 a.m. to noon. Dinner is sometime between 4 p.m. and 10 p.m. - whenever everyone gets hungry enough and my stepmother is ready to fix it. No midday meal, just potato chips and candy available for whenever anyone wants a snack. The biggest events of the day are letting the dogs out to run the property and watering the gardens...whenever they decide to do it.
Home...where even when our home is messy, it is just a simple mess and clutter. I’ve missed feeling clean.
I admit to being a lazy housekeeper at times and a messy person, but I’ve never seen anything like this before. The only word to describe it is squaller. Outside, there are at least a dozen junk cars on the property. Some are just rusting hulks with parts already gleaned from them, some are waiting for dissection. There are 2 buildings that are each equal size to the house - each used for storage of unknown stuff, completely full. Inside the house are pathways to chairs, kitchen, bedrooms, between the bed and the door, etc. No open space at all...mostly I think due to a hoarder mentality. With the exception of the dishes, nothing inside the house has been cleaned since I was there 4 years ago. There are items on shelves that have not been moved in those 4 years, with the accumulated dust and filth of those years showing. The entire house smells of urine since one of the toilets overflows daily. They bathe once a week, brush their teeth twice a week and change clothes about every 4 days. In New Mexico the temperature is about 85 this time of year...and everything there pretty much stinks.
Home...where we have actual quiet and calm. I’ve missed the simplicity of quiet.
I like a good TV show or movie and will usually play my music pretty loudly. There are 5 TV’s at my birth father’s home. All of them are on, 24/7...and loud! There are 7 living grandchildren, any or all of whom are on site at any given time. Everyone is clamoring to be heard over the noise of the TV’s or the other people.
Home...where we have actual conversations with one another instead of thinking out what stories we will tell while the other person is talking. I’ve missed the give and take of a real conversation.
My sweet husband and I sometimes argue that the other person is not listening...but it’s not completely true. We hear one another and respond to the conversation or “spirited discussion” appropriately. There, everyone is so busy thinking up the next story to tell or what they want to say that nobody ever asks a thing about anyone else. It was a time of being talked “at” instead of talked “with”. One would think that a birth family would want to get to know a person...what they think, like, want, do, etc. Apparently it was more important to ignore what I was saying about my life (when I could say anything at all) and tell me more about the things they have done.
Home...where we have openness coupled with caring instead of undercurrents of fear, concern and hostility. I’m so grateful that my sweet husband and I discuss the things in life that make us concerned for one another - whether health, work or just daily things.
My birth father is 82 and starting to fail, but nobody will talk about it. I could see the concern, but it was very obvious that it was not open for discussion even if I had not been there. My sister is just beginning to allow herself to grieve the loss of her 17 year old son who died in November. No one will talk about it with her. Instead, they watch her with deep concern, but will not even ask her how she is doing. I did...and discovered that she is in a self-destructive mode. I am so glad I asked, because we were able to talk through some of her grief and how to get her some help so that she gets out of the self-destructive mode. She will never truly get over the loss of her son, I understand that part, but she needs to be able to cope and move out of self-destruct mode.
Home...where making up after an argument is sweet without requiring a trip to the ER and another argument is waiting on your return.
My sister’s oldest son spent much time with his dad after the divorce. Sadly, he was told many things about his mother that were not true. There is bitterness, resentment, and a large lack of respect. The night before I arrived, they got into a fight and he threw a kitchen chair at her...causing a bruised heel-bone and the need for crutches for the next several weeks or months. Another night while I was there, they got into a yelling fight just after I went to bed. The only way I could cope with their fight was to turn on the fan, put my pillow over my ears and whisper to myself, “shut up, shut up, shut up!” I worry about them both.
Home...where I am loved. I didn’t miss out on being loved.
In spite of all the stuff I’ve written, they love me and are not afraid to show it. There was a little planning to show me the areas they tell me about - where they hunt elk for meat, where they camp, where they log trees for firewood - going 4-wheeling in those areas, and also a massive family BBQ where we laughed and teased one another. Even me, as if I’d lived there always. I wish this post didn’t sound so judgmental. I love them and am glad I went. The contrast between our lives is just so harsh.
Home...
...may there be mercy as I process all the emotions of this trip.
Friday, May 30, 2008
new mexico
Am posting on my last day here. It's been a good visit, but one filled with a ton of conflicting emotions. A bit of overload. Will be glad to be home with my sweet husband tomorrow. I've missed him!!
More on this trip to see my birth father soon... when I'm not posting from my phone!
...may there be mercy as I process and as I travel.
More on this trip to see my birth father soon... when I'm not posting from my phone!
...may there be mercy as I process and as I travel.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
catching up
Wow... been a while, eh?
Got a nasty bout with bronchitis... followed by a relapse of bronchitis... compounded with a couple family emergencies... and topped with a lovely trip to the ER since I am the Queen of Klutz.
Big sigh.
Yep, I'm on crutches, with a brace on my leg from upper thigh to almost my ankle. It's simply lovely and just the accessory a shoe maven would want for the summer. Thankfully I think I'll only have it for another week.
Oh, you want to know why, don't you?
You know me. You know I'm a Klutz! How about the good story or stories that I've come up with instead??
1. Got into a bar fight.
2. Took on a motorcycle gang.
3. Joined the Roller Derby (this is my personal favorite, and the most believable since there really is roller derby nearby.)
Oh, you don't believe these and are laughing at me.
Real story... BORING!!!... is that I didn't realize the vacuum cord was around my ankle and took a step...
Timmmmmmmmm-berrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!
Yep, like a tree in the forest, down I went. All 5 foot 9 inches of me... full weight... on my right knee.
Did anyone hear the bad words where you live?? I'm sure they were loud enough.
So fast forward a bit through the ER visit and the follow up doc visit 6 days later. No broken bones. Not torn in bad ways. Hamburger for parts of the knee and swollen still to almost twice the normal size. (a full week later!!!) Equates to a horrific sprain that will take time to heal.
So... I'm traveling to Albuquerque tomorrow to see my birth father... with this huge brace and crutches. Should be fun, eh?
...may there be mercy as I travel and fast healing.
Got a nasty bout with bronchitis... followed by a relapse of bronchitis... compounded with a couple family emergencies... and topped with a lovely trip to the ER since I am the Queen of Klutz.
Big sigh.
Yep, I'm on crutches, with a brace on my leg from upper thigh to almost my ankle. It's simply lovely and just the accessory a shoe maven would want for the summer. Thankfully I think I'll only have it for another week.
Oh, you want to know why, don't you?
You know me. You know I'm a Klutz! How about the good story or stories that I've come up with instead??
1. Got into a bar fight.
2. Took on a motorcycle gang.
3. Joined the Roller Derby (this is my personal favorite, and the most believable since there really is roller derby nearby.)
Oh, you don't believe these and are laughing at me.
Real story... BORING!!!... is that I didn't realize the vacuum cord was around my ankle and took a step...
Timmmmmmmmm-berrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!
Yep, like a tree in the forest, down I went. All 5 foot 9 inches of me... full weight... on my right knee.
Did anyone hear the bad words where you live?? I'm sure they were loud enough.
So fast forward a bit through the ER visit and the follow up doc visit 6 days later. No broken bones. Not torn in bad ways. Hamburger for parts of the knee and swollen still to almost twice the normal size. (a full week later!!!) Equates to a horrific sprain that will take time to heal.
So... I'm traveling to Albuquerque tomorrow to see my birth father... with this huge brace and crutches. Should be fun, eh?
...may there be mercy as I travel and fast healing.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
bronchial blues
Have been sick all week with bronchitis. Ugh!
...may there be mercy and a quick end to coughing.
...may there be mercy and a quick end to coughing.
Monday, March 31, 2008
3BT spring
Just need to take a moment and find some beauty...
1. matching up fabric triangles for a quilt. It's for my sister-in-law and I let her pick the fabrics. I would not have picked them to go together, but the colors are pleasing nonetheless.
2. having a brand new radiant heater under my desk at work. It sends a little warm glow over me and I feel better.
3. hearing Mama's voice today.
...may there be mercy and moments to find beauty.
1. matching up fabric triangles for a quilt. It's for my sister-in-law and I let her pick the fabrics. I would not have picked them to go together, but the colors are pleasing nonetheless.
2. having a brand new radiant heater under my desk at work. It sends a little warm glow over me and I feel better.
3. hearing Mama's voice today.
...may there be mercy and moments to find beauty.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
quilt of love and hate
It's National Quilting Day and yes, I'm spending today quilting away. This quilt is for my friend, coworker and the Official Office Big Brother, James... who has inoperable, terminal liver cancer.
Last year I made 5 quilts for friends with cancer. As I sewed, I prayed for each of them. For healing, for comfort, for the awareness of how much each of them is loved, for strength in the treatment process, for peace.
And for a year not filled with making quilts for friends with cancer.
Thus far, each of them is kicking cancer's ass... even Dwight, who has pancreatic cancer and we know that he probably won't see Christmas. But he wasn't supposed to see last Christmas, so the fact that he is still with us, fighting with all he has, means he is kicking cancer's ass.
But James... sweet, loving, caring, generous, big-brother James... his health has been so bad for so long that he doesn't have that much left in him to be able to fight as hard. Bless him, he hasn't given up yet, but his ability to fight as hard as others might... well, it just isn't there.
So I'm working quickly on this quilt. For many reasons, I love this quilt. For other reasons, I hate it.
I love it because the fabrics are rich and lush, yet simple in the designs. They speak to me of James. Civil war reproduction prints that are beautiful. I hate it because James is so much a part of my life and he is being taken away from me.
Love it because it's tested my ability to allow imperfections without fretting about them. Love isn't perfect, and it's about letting people be imperfect. Hate it because James won't be able to enjoy it for very long.
Love it because the quilting in the border is symbolic of hugs and kisses and the hope that he feels wrapped in love when he uses it. Hate it because I so hate cancer for the suffering and pain it causes.
As I stitch, sometimes the tears block my vision so badly that I can't tell what I'm doing.
Enough rambling... I need to dry my eyes and put the binding on this quilt of love and hate.
...may there be mercy in the sorrow and joy in our time left with James.
Last year I made 5 quilts for friends with cancer. As I sewed, I prayed for each of them. For healing, for comfort, for the awareness of how much each of them is loved, for strength in the treatment process, for peace.
And for a year not filled with making quilts for friends with cancer.
Thus far, each of them is kicking cancer's ass... even Dwight, who has pancreatic cancer and we know that he probably won't see Christmas. But he wasn't supposed to see last Christmas, so the fact that he is still with us, fighting with all he has, means he is kicking cancer's ass.
But James... sweet, loving, caring, generous, big-brother James... his health has been so bad for so long that he doesn't have that much left in him to be able to fight as hard. Bless him, he hasn't given up yet, but his ability to fight as hard as others might... well, it just isn't there.
So I'm working quickly on this quilt. For many reasons, I love this quilt. For other reasons, I hate it.
I love it because the fabrics are rich and lush, yet simple in the designs. They speak to me of James. Civil war reproduction prints that are beautiful. I hate it because James is so much a part of my life and he is being taken away from me.
Love it because it's tested my ability to allow imperfections without fretting about them. Love isn't perfect, and it's about letting people be imperfect. Hate it because James won't be able to enjoy it for very long.
Love it because the quilting in the border is symbolic of hugs and kisses and the hope that he feels wrapped in love when he uses it. Hate it because I so hate cancer for the suffering and pain it causes.
As I stitch, sometimes the tears block my vision so badly that I can't tell what I'm doing.
Enough rambling... I need to dry my eyes and put the binding on this quilt of love and hate.
...may there be mercy in the sorrow and joy in our time left with James.
Sunday, March 09, 2008
normal life
So... ummm... yeah, it's been a while.
A lot has been happening and yet, nothing more than normal life.
At the same time, normal life is a wonderful thing.
Here's an overview of stuff. If you are interested in more detail on any of these things or anything else... email, call or sit down over coffee with me. Y'all know I love to talk. Besides, it will give me a chance to catch up on you - which is more important to me anyway!
• Health: Neck is doing better after a series of trigger point injections and some really good physical therapy. Yep, that's injections, plural. Lots of needles (with medicine in them!) stuck into my neck, shoulder and upper back. During the sticking... a bit on the "OWIE" side. Within a couple minutes, waaaaaay less pain and I'm liking that! The best news is that so far this year I've not gotten the terrible congestion-type crud that has been making the rounds at my office.
• Work: mostly equates to same stuff, new day. Nothing terrible, nothing wonderful... but that's actually kinda cool right now. At the same time, we are really hoping for it to get busier soon.
• Family in San Diego: Mama and sisters are fine. Big brother continues to do well in spite of the toll his illness took on his body. Next brother is holding on, but barely. His life is horrible right now, but he is chosing to stay where he is in order to have a positive influence on his young son, age 6. I bless him for this choice... and worry about him for it at the same time. Last brother has deliberately chosen to go back into the drug culture and is using again. I'm really, really pissed off at him. Long story. Since it was a deliberate choice, I'm pissed.
• Precious Father-in-law is doing well for an 85 year old man. We spent the evening with him recently and just enjoyed our time so much. He makes me laugh!
• Sweet husband is delightful. He bought me a new ring to celebrate our 20th anniversary... and it's stunning. We put the diamond from my original engagement ring into it. He was so cute and had such a sweet grin on his face when he slipped this new ring on my finger. Gosh, but I love that man.
• The timechange will take a few days for us to acclimate. I've never done well with the spring loss of an hour. Takes me longer than most folks to get over that exhausted feeling of getting up earler.
And... thanks to that timechange issue, I'm exhausted and going to stop rambling for tonight.
...may there be mercy in our normal life issues...
A lot has been happening and yet, nothing more than normal life.
At the same time, normal life is a wonderful thing.
Here's an overview of stuff. If you are interested in more detail on any of these things or anything else... email, call or sit down over coffee with me. Y'all know I love to talk. Besides, it will give me a chance to catch up on you - which is more important to me anyway!
• Health: Neck is doing better after a series of trigger point injections and some really good physical therapy. Yep, that's injections, plural. Lots of needles (with medicine in them!) stuck into my neck, shoulder and upper back. During the sticking... a bit on the "OWIE" side. Within a couple minutes, waaaaaay less pain and I'm liking that! The best news is that so far this year I've not gotten the terrible congestion-type crud that has been making the rounds at my office.
• Work: mostly equates to same stuff, new day. Nothing terrible, nothing wonderful... but that's actually kinda cool right now. At the same time, we are really hoping for it to get busier soon.
• Family in San Diego: Mama and sisters are fine. Big brother continues to do well in spite of the toll his illness took on his body. Next brother is holding on, but barely. His life is horrible right now, but he is chosing to stay where he is in order to have a positive influence on his young son, age 6. I bless him for this choice... and worry about him for it at the same time. Last brother has deliberately chosen to go back into the drug culture and is using again. I'm really, really pissed off at him. Long story. Since it was a deliberate choice, I'm pissed.
• Precious Father-in-law is doing well for an 85 year old man. We spent the evening with him recently and just enjoyed our time so much. He makes me laugh!
• Sweet husband is delightful. He bought me a new ring to celebrate our 20th anniversary... and it's stunning. We put the diamond from my original engagement ring into it. He was so cute and had such a sweet grin on his face when he slipped this new ring on my finger. Gosh, but I love that man.
• The timechange will take a few days for us to acclimate. I've never done well with the spring loss of an hour. Takes me longer than most folks to get over that exhausted feeling of getting up earler.
And... thanks to that timechange issue, I'm exhausted and going to stop rambling for tonight.
...may there be mercy in our normal life issues...
Friday, February 29, 2008
another check in
Been a little overbooked with schedule lately. Lots of chaos with family stuff. Got a couple emails checking in to see if I am okay.
I'm okay!
Will make a stab at a real blog post over the weekend.
...may there be mercy in the chaos...
I'm okay!
Will make a stab at a real blog post over the weekend.
...may there be mercy in the chaos...
Monday, February 11, 2008
checking in
Waving and letting y'all know I'm still kicking! Just busy and a little on the overloaded side. Nothing that will kill me, just juggling a little too much... and trying to throw back some of the balls being juggled!
...may there be mercy as I find a better balance.
...may there be mercy as I find a better balance.
Sunday, February 03, 2008
one for me
According to my sweet husband, I've made quilts for everyone in this solar system and then some... and it's about time that I made one for myself.
He's cute, but he tends to exaggerate a bit.
In spite of his exaggerations, he's right in that I've made a lot of things for other people. I've only made things for myself if it was for a particular class in order to learn a particular technique. I had not taken the same amount of time and care and love to plan a quilt for myself.
This afternoon, I finished the first quilt simply made with careful planning, designing and love for ME. It's wonderful and makes me smile.
The fabrics were mostly gifts, with a couple that I found to add into the mix. The black and white theme is what I'm changing my house to be... all black and white with my quilts, my husband's trains and our photographs to add color.
In this black and white quilt, there is a bit of purple sprinkled in. The purple speaks to me in many ways. The biggest heartspeak is because it was a gift from a dear friend.
When I wrap myself in this quilt, that purple reminds me that she sends big hugs to me... and that makes me happy.
...may there be mercy in the warmth of my quilt and my friends.
He's cute, but he tends to exaggerate a bit.
In spite of his exaggerations, he's right in that I've made a lot of things for other people. I've only made things for myself if it was for a particular class in order to learn a particular technique. I had not taken the same amount of time and care and love to plan a quilt for myself.
This afternoon, I finished the first quilt simply made with careful planning, designing and love for ME. It's wonderful and makes me smile.
The fabrics were mostly gifts, with a couple that I found to add into the mix. The black and white theme is what I'm changing my house to be... all black and white with my quilts, my husband's trains and our photographs to add color.
In this black and white quilt, there is a bit of purple sprinkled in. The purple speaks to me in many ways. The biggest heartspeak is because it was a gift from a dear friend.
When I wrap myself in this quilt, that purple reminds me that she sends big hugs to me... and that makes me happy.
...may there be mercy in the warmth of my quilt and my friends.
Sunday, January 13, 2008
3BT, weekend of celebration
1. sitting in front of the fireplace in our hotel room, late at night, sipping wine, laughing and talking with my sweet husband.
2. sitting in front of the fireplace in our hotel room, early morning, sipping coffee, looking at the water view, watching the gulls soar and hearing them calling.
3. holding hands, sharing hearts, twenty years, wow.
...may there be mercy in the beautiful things that make up our lives...
2. sitting in front of the fireplace in our hotel room, early morning, sipping coffee, looking at the water view, watching the gulls soar and hearing them calling.
3. holding hands, sharing hearts, twenty years, wow.
...may there be mercy in the beautiful things that make up our lives...
Friday, January 11, 2008
3BT... new year, new BT
Well, my blessed friends, it's a new year. We are going away for the weekend to celebrate that lovely thing of being married for 20 years.
My sweet husband deserves a medal or more for putting up with me for that long, but that's a whole 'nuther story that will never be told in this venue!
Tonight will be a quickie 3 Beautiful Things night and then we are gone.
1. my co-worker's 2 year old niece trying to say "see ya later" and how adorable it sounded as more of a "waiter, waiter" than anything else... and the fabulous grin that accompanied those sweet sounds. ( I really wanted to ask for coffee or dessert or french fries when she kept saying "waiter"!)
2. the way cool email from the hotel concierge when I told her that we are celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary at her hotel and that we prefer wine to champagne... and how she totally JUMPED at providing wine instead for us. Not to mention the lovely congratulatory thoughts she expressed to us.
3. the hug from my favorite grocery clerk today when I gave her a rice bag I'd made. One of those simple, little things that take less than 5 minutes to make, but help much when the body is hurting. She injured her hip a few months back and has been limping... but she's been worried more about my neck pain than her own. That hug was so incredibly sweet.
...may there be mercy and we find beautiful things each day.
My sweet husband deserves a medal or more for putting up with me for that long, but that's a whole 'nuther story that will never be told in this venue!
Tonight will be a quickie 3 Beautiful Things night and then we are gone.
1. my co-worker's 2 year old niece trying to say "see ya later" and how adorable it sounded as more of a "waiter, waiter" than anything else... and the fabulous grin that accompanied those sweet sounds. ( I really wanted to ask for coffee or dessert or french fries when she kept saying "waiter"!)
2. the way cool email from the hotel concierge when I told her that we are celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary at her hotel and that we prefer wine to champagne... and how she totally JUMPED at providing wine instead for us. Not to mention the lovely congratulatory thoughts she expressed to us.
3. the hug from my favorite grocery clerk today when I gave her a rice bag I'd made. One of those simple, little things that take less than 5 minutes to make, but help much when the body is hurting. She injured her hip a few months back and has been limping... but she's been worried more about my neck pain than her own. That hug was so incredibly sweet.
...may there be mercy and we find beautiful things each day.
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
20 years
Tomorrow marks a special day for us... my sweet husband and I will celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary. Wow!
It's actually pretty dang cool since at the time of our 10th anniversary we were so close to divorce that we never thought we'd make the 10 year and one day mark. God worked miracles and healing in both our hearts.
Tomorrow we will have a simple evening together. Probably go out to Johnny Carrino's, maybe stay home... we haven't decided yet. The bigger celebration will be in our going away for the weekend.
Nice man has planned a romantic getaway for us at a hotel. Wine tasting in the lobby. Fireplace in the room. Champagne and hand made chocolates. Dinner at a nice restaurant. Time together... blessed time together.
...may there be mercy as we celebrate and many more years together.
It's actually pretty dang cool since at the time of our 10th anniversary we were so close to divorce that we never thought we'd make the 10 year and one day mark. God worked miracles and healing in both our hearts.
Tomorrow we will have a simple evening together. Probably go out to Johnny Carrino's, maybe stay home... we haven't decided yet. The bigger celebration will be in our going away for the weekend.
Nice man has planned a romantic getaway for us at a hotel. Wine tasting in the lobby. Fireplace in the room. Champagne and hand made chocolates. Dinner at a nice restaurant. Time together... blessed time together.
...may there be mercy as we celebrate and many more years together.
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